[livejournal.com profile] hunter_returns The reasons why---we save something evil...

Oct. 27th, 2011 12:40 am
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[personal profile] lenore_vampire
Lenore wasn't sure how she had gotten here to this place, she knew very well how she got to this point in her existence though. Forever hungry, but sadly she now wanted to eat those that she had always been so adamant against partaking upon. That is up until recently. Once the All Mother arose, she had made it absolutely impossible for Lenore, and others just like her in mind, and spirit to say no to the violent taking of human blood. Yet, a good portion of those beings Lenore knew, and now hunted and killed, did not care about having the All Mother arisen because they would happily join in to hear a human suffer while they drank them dry, and then left them there to become like themselves.

Lenore, sadly, was now just another pawn in Satan's game, as well as another lost soul in the world full of immoral pain, and immortal hunger. Lenore knew that when she had been made, she was so eager to go against the grain due to what she had been right before she had been turned. It helped her out immensely, as did Eli's help. If Eli had not found her, and helped her to stop attacking people and instead go after cattle she might have become something so much more twisted than what she was now. Sadly enough, she was now just a ravenous, human blood drinking freak and there was not a thing she could do to stop it. Eve was too powerful, and Eli and her pack were all dead--so, they couldn't help her try to push-off what was happening. They were dead, and for a long while now even. They were killed by friends of Gordon Walkers, who had come after Lenore and her nest, with the help of Sam and Dean Winchester, and because of that meeting things had changed severely for Gordon in a short period of time. Cut to now, a long time after all the things that had happened to Gordon because of Lenore and his running into the Winchesters. His capture, then release from prison back into society, then his being bitten and turned into what Lenore was, (as well as his own little sister--whom Gordon killed violently without a thought or feeling of the pain that she must have gone through once she was bitten and turned into a vampire), then he was killed by Sam Winchester.

That was who she turned to now, Sam Winchester.

Lenore could no longer hunt the damned or the evil that she had been hunting for years after her entire nest was wiped out by Gordon's friends while she was stuck somewhere else. Stuck there until she could get back to them and find out what had happened. Eli and the other were not there for her anymore, and because they all died Lenore decided to be more of a lone wolf. Since she was alone now she had no one to help her at least try to bury those feelings that Eve was forcing her to feel so much more intensely now deep down inside of herself until they couldn't even be buried any longer. Being on your own meant you had to rely on just you, and being with just you meant that once the pain and fear, and ache got so intense for you there was no one and nothing left to help you to cope or work through it. Not a soul that could help you to make all the tough, intense and seriously scary decisions that you needed to have forced down your throat with some scalding hot tongs, and some all-encompassing love. So, she used the Dead Man's Blood for as long as she could to poison herself into unconsciousness so that she wouldn't eat those whom she was helping to protect by going out and hunting those scary things that hid under your bed, or supposedly lived deep down in the farthest reaches of your dreamscape, or the scariest, darkest places of your soul. Lenore had no more will to burn, no one left to turn toward, nothing left to help her fight against these dark and evil forces anymore. She felt she was seriously going to lose it. So, Lenore sought out those two beings that were working for and with those angels. Those really scary, mean, soulless angelic creatures that were supposed to be working for the forces of good, and yet seemed to not care about humans or good at all. But even if it seemed like those forces of good were almost as bad as those forces that fought for the those that were truly evil, and most vile--she was going to go to them.

So, here she was hopped up on Dead Man's Blood and really just at the bottom of the bottom of her worst behavio--so bad that she could never even imagine being anywhere but here! Yet, Lenore did have faith, and her belief in God. So, she hoped that she could find some kind of mercy, some hope, some kind of understanding of where she was at mentally, emotionally, and psychologically so that they would condone to helping her in some manner. May be that they would devise a plan to begin helping her get her dignity back or may be they would take some pity on her and get her some type of miracle! Even if that was grasping at straws currently.

Standing among Sam, Dean and Cas, she had to explain that she had tried to continue with the no eating humans path she and her nest had been on. Yet, her nest had been gone a while now and with Eve around, no one, not even herself, or possibly even stronger beings than herself with like minds could stop themselves--it was all too powerful a feeling. No one could stand up and stay as pure as Lenore or her nest had been when they had been eating nothing but cattle. No one seemed able to stand up to Eve's powers! The All Mother was just too immense for them, to all-encompassing for any being to shake off and say no too. So, Lenore had slipped, and because she was really, really adamant, due to her background, to never drink human blood ever again! She came to Sam and Dean for help or death so that she could live up to that decision. It really seemed that dying was the only way for her to go now. She had continued to try to buckle down by poisoning herself every day, then every couple of hours, then almost every hour with Dead Man's Blood to stave off the need, but even that wasn't helping her to stop any longer.

So, here she was ready to beg Sam and Dean to kill her, to just put her out of her misery in order to stop her from continuing with this hunger and pain that she has been dealing with all on her own. There was nothing left for her now, no one to turn to, nothing to look forward too. Though when Lenore looked upon Sam once more she could certainly feel that good tension, that good chemistry with Sam once again. Yet, what would all that do for her now? All this pain and intensity seemed like it would be all she would have to look forward to from now on. Her feelings for Sam would do nothing good, would it? She couldn't change, could she? How would it be possible at this point? So when she lifted her eyes toward Sam once more, when she looked upon Sam once again, Lenore quickly averted her eyes, looking to the floor. She wanted to sob, to cry everything that was currently poisoning her soul out completely so that she might feel some peace. She hadn't even noticed that Castiel had grabbed her by her head at that point since she was so lost inside of her own pain, and her own need to react fast enough. So out of it at that moment to realize what he was about to do. Something she had asked for, yes, but now that she was looking at Sam once again so many other feelings, ideas, and needs had woken up inside of the vampire.

Date: 2011-10-28 11:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hunter-returns.livejournal.com
Sam tilted his head forward and sipped at his coffee. He'd abandoned his post outside the panic room only long enough to refill his cup.

If anyone had asked him, he wouldn't be able to give a completely satsifactory answer as far as why he'd prevented Castiel from killing Lenore. She'd spared his life once; if nothing else, he owed her.

But he kept vigil outside the panic room while she was lost in the throes of bloodlust. They'd killed Eve - it would only be a matter of time to see if she could fight her way back to herself.

It had been quiet for hours.

Sam tapped on the iron door. "Hey. You still with me in there?"

Date: 2011-10-31 05:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lenore-vampire.livejournal.com
Lenore had been stewing in her own juices, so to speak, when she suddenly heard that almost gentle rapping at the door to her cell. When she had, Lenore bum-rushed the door with a loud, predatory growl of pure anger, and annoyance and yelled toward Sam at the top of her lungs.

"LET ME OUT, WINCHESTER!!!!!" Her hands banged against the door harder, and harder still until the flesh bled. Raking her nails down the metal of the door. Growling menacingly for him to let her out, she was fine. She didn't need him. Just let her out to eat!

Date: 2011-11-03 02:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hunter-returns.livejournal.com
"So, that would be a no then," he said quietly. They'd killed Eve, why was it taking her so long to recover?

Or was she too far gone? Had he made a mistake in telling Cas to spare her life?

Date: 2011-11-03 05:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lenore-vampire.livejournal.com
It had been a really long time after he spoke to her that Lenore finally felt her body being drained of all this energy. This pain, and that leech like being that had been riding her so hard, and so fast as of late. Lenore couldn't function, couldn't really see much of anything. Her energy, her being was focused on one thing, and one thing only. Getting past this, because to Lenore--humanity was sacred. Their lives, their being should be protected, nurtured, and Lenore wanted to just get right back to doing that. It was still hard, that residual hunger still clawed at her stomach a bit. Yet, Lenore wanted to get past that! She wanted to get back to the fight, so to speak.

She leaned against the wall of the cell near the door. Gently clawing at the door since she had no energy. She needed to eat! The clawing was the most energy she had and she was trying to use it to get Sam's attention.

"Sam..." she said his name weakly. "Sam, please?" She said a bit louder, groaning as that hunger clawed at her again. Having been unable to eat for so long because cattle was not satisfying to her due to the pressure she felt, the need to hunt a human prey and eat them. She used all that Dead Man's Blood to keep herself from eating another person. It made her weak, needy. "...won't hurt you." She said in a soft, raspy voice.

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Lenore (Supernatural)

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